I was traveling for a conference and was meeting my new manager, Karen for the first time. We had spoken by phone but this was before the days of zoom so other than a directory photo we hadn’t ever seen each other before. She said she wanted to some time with me so we met for a drink.
What happened next was something that stuck with me and it’s a practice I teach to this day. She asked me a pretty simple question, “What’s your story?” I was puzzled by the question. I didn’t know if she meant how did I get the job, or what I want to be when I grow up. It seemed so broad so I asked her, “What do you mean?” She replied, “Tell me about Lyndsay.” I responded, “You mean my life story? All of it?!?! How much time do you have?” She chuckled and said, “Yes, I want all of it. I want to understand what makes you tick and what makes you the seller you are today.”
I was blown away by her simple question. I was so excited my manager wanted to know about me. I had certainly had terrific relationships with past bosses before but nobody ever really asked me that. I was truly touched by her approach.
Fast forward many years- I was managing someone I had just hired and we met for lunch. He came prepared for forecast, client knowledge, product knowledge and his business plan. (None of which I asked that he prepare for our lunch). We sat down and he was getting ready to share his knowledge and I pulled out Karen’s question from years ago, “What’s your story?” His reaction was similar to mine and when he finished, his reply was, “Wow, we just got to know each other really fast!” Later, on a 1:1, I asked him how he was doing in his new role and one of the things he said to me was, “Lyndsay, I love it. I feel seen and I feel like you understand me.”
Isn’t that what we all want?
